The Most Absurd Deck Ever

Day of Judgement. Haha.

o.o

O.o

o.O

O.O

*brain explodes*

My head hurts.

I often like to think of myself in a large battlefield casting these things while playing just to have more fun with all the cards and their flavors. Visually speaking, could you just imagine what it would look like to see all those creature burnt to death by a single lightning bolt?

you Sir, have won at life. Also put in Parallel lives to double the doubling of the doubling of the original doubling.

I found a quicker way to do this and with less cards, but a 3rd colour is needed:

Turn Doubling Season into a 5/5 creature with Opalescence and then enchant Doubling with Followed Footsteps.

Now if I'm correct, you'd need to start using this formula to keep count of your Doubling Season tokens:
Y=2^n where Y is the number of tokens you put into play instead of 1, and n is the number of doubling seasons.

Enjoy the migraines keeping count of those token Doubling Seasons :p

again, i say win. Now imagine pyrotwin in this deck.

Sooooo. What are the ods of this actually coming into play? My new magic mind and not smartness.

How many rounds does it take to put this into play, and the likely hood of it happening?

You can use parallel lives to get even more tokens!

Opponent: I now have 94,447,329,658,217,537,994,754 Golems!
Me: I cast Doom Blade on Precursor Golem
Opponent: O_O

lol no need for wrath of god id preffer doom blade

wtb haste.

Splinter Twin? XD For more lawls?

well 100 cards seem pretty damn steep,, we'll now i have a great word of advice this deck "CANT WIN" its impossible your deck is built for really long games my decks go for that 5th turn win

then i tap four swamps and play damnation

Add 4 Parallel Lives and then in theory you could have even more doubling seasons out lol

Hey guys, he knows it's easy to kill. :P That's not the point! The point is that he can get out mindblowing numbers of tokens in a single turn, not that they might not survive longer than the turn they come out.

Still blows MY mind, at least. LOL

ale96 has deleted this comment.

The white leyline that you and stuff you got can't be targeted. And grand abolisher

I know Doom Blades, et al., would kill every token. This deck is only playable within a vacuum, and even then only because I wanted to type out absurdly large numbers, the likes of which saproling decks have never seen.

I would put in Parallel Lives, but honestly.. I'd have to rewrite the entire deck description over to accommodate 2^40 tokens rather than 2^36. Don't make me do more maths :(

Also, I find it funny that this of all my decks would make it to front page XD

what about if your opponent is able to cast phyrexian rebirth? a token 94,447,329,658,217,537,994,754 + 343,597,383,686 / 94,447,329,658,217,537,994,754 + 343,597,383,686 ( i don't like math!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

It's too bad that I had a bloodseeker out and now your life total is at negative 137,438,953,454 lol

Parallel Lives!!! Amazing Deck!

vapor snag.......game

Naturalize Asceticism, then Hideous End on a golem. I win! :P

Yo! Thank you!

This deck IS extremely absurd, and it makes me want to add Copy Enchantment, Precursor Golem and Followed Footsteps to my Momir Vig EDH, and they really aren't bad cards (the deck also has Avenger of Zendikar in it. :S ).

epic naturalize

Add one Fallen Angel to attack with.
Spirit Link

...Mycoloth...devour all...add paradox haze after that for more giggle (work also with followed footsteps) :D

94,447,329,658,217,537,994,754 = ninety four sextillion four hundred forty seven quintillion three hundred twenty nine quadrillion six hundred fifty eight trillion two hundred seventeen billion five hundred thirty seven million nine hundred ninety four thousand seven hundred fifty four... not the kind of number I would want to say during a match.

Absolutely hilarious. You may as well enter a tourney and after winning the first match against your opponent with this just say, hey, do you even wanna give it a round two, or just surrender now?

Screw it, just input the exponential function into a graphing calculator and save yourself the trouble.

Sorry to ruin your guys day. having more than one doubling season out does not double the affect. Doubling season is a replacement affect therefore will only happen one Having 1 doubling season out and making 2 tokens off of persecueter golem would make 4 but having 2 doubling seasons does not then double that. Replacement affects are a bitch.

also, you should chuck in a banefire. just one.

this is interesting and looks like it could be fun to play, if you slimmed it down to 60 cards, and tightened the theme a little more

Add cackling counterpart :)

I CANT and i dont want to count that!
God job dude

Now, i really enjoy the absurdness of this deck, and I would just like to make a small suggestion to makes the winning with this deck even more absurd!

Everyone can tell then when you have such an ammount of golems, victory is imminent. But isn't it just a bit boring to win just by making all your golems hit your opnnent in the face? (even though his face will be pretty mashed up). I suggest you add 1 Magnetic Mine, 1 Sky Swallower, and 1 Oxidize. What you do then is, you play the Magnetic Mine (after having made all your golems and your golems' golems), then play Sky Swallower so the your opnnent gets ALL your permanents, AND THEN! You play 1 forest and Oxidize his newly aquired golems, making him take even more insane ammounts of dammage, than one would like to think about!

Anyhow, awesome deck!

Goldthunder has deleted this comment.

Let's see how much golems can we put into play shall we?
First of all let's just place sum things so we can double our doubling seasons freely

1x Mirror Gallery
1x Mycosynth Lattice
1x March of the Machines

Ok, now our doubling seasons are all artifact creatures. So let's clone them!

4x Doubling season
4x Parallel Lives

4x Copy enchantment
4x Sculpting steel
4x Phyrexian Metamorph
4x Phantasmal Image
4x Splinter Twin
4x Cackling counterpart
4x Clone
4x Quicksilver Gargantuan
4x Vesuvan Shapeshifter
4x Copy Artifact
4x Evil Twin
4x Sakashima the Impostor
4x Vesuvan Doppelganger

We'll end up with 60 doubling seasons, so when we want to place a token, instead we'll place 2^60 tokens. (that's 1,152,921,504,606,846,976 tokens =P)

Wait, we still have Rites of Replication!
Ok, let's clone our doubling Season 5 times. NO! 5 * 1,152,921,504,606,846,976 to be precise.
that will end us with 5,764,607,523,034,234,880, besides the initial 60 we already had =P.

And now, if we would like to play another Rites of Replication, instead we'll be placing an astounding
5 * 2 ^ 5,764,607,523,034,234,940 new tokens,
that will add up with the ones we already had,
5 * (2 ^ 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) + 5,764,607,523,034,234,940
Which can't be formulated by any calculator I know... (and we only used 2 of our 4 Rite of Replication...)

3rd Rite would turn out something like this

5 * 2 ^ (5 * (2 ^ 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) + 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) +
(5 * (2 ^ 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) + 5,764,607,523,034,234,940)

And finally the 4th would turn out to be so big I myself don't understand how the hell would I find the money to buy so many tokens xD

5 * 2 ^ (5 * 2 ^ (5 * (2 ^ 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) + 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) +
(5 * (2 ^ 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) + 5,764,607,523,034,234,940)) +
(5 * 2 ^ (5 * (2 ^ 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) + 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) +
(5 * (2 ^ 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) + 5,764,607,523,034,234,940))

And at last, let's just place our 4 Precursor Golem shall we?

1st would go like

1 + 2 * (5 * 2 ^ (5 * 2 ^ (5 * (2 ^ 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) + 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) +
(5 * (2 ^ 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) + 5,764,607,523,034,234,940)) +
(5 * 2 ^ (5 * (2 ^ 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) + 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) +
(5 * (2 ^ 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) + 5,764,607,523,034,234,940))) Tokens

2nd would go like

1 + 2 * (5 * 2 ^ (5 * 2 ^ (5 * (2 ^ 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) + 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) +
(5 * (2 ^ 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) + 5,764,607,523,034,234,940)) +
(5 * 2 ^ (5 * (2 ^ 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) + 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) +
(5 * (2 ^ 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) + 5,764,607,523,034,234,940))) +
1 + 2 * (5 * 2 ^ (5 * 2 ^ (5 * (2 ^ 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) + 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) +
(5 * (2 ^ 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) + 5,764,607,523,034,234,940)) +
(5 * 2 ^ (5 * (2 ^ 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) + 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) +
(5 * (2 ^ 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) + 5,764,607,523,034,234,940))) Tokens

3rd would go like this (all ppl gather up to see you getting your truck load of tokens)
p.s. a truck wouldn't be enough xD

1 + 2 * (5 * 2 ^ (5 * 2 ^ (5 * (2 ^ 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) + 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) +
(5 * (2 ^ 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) + 5,764,607,523,034,234,940)) +
(5 * 2 ^ (5 * (2 ^ 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) + 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) +
(5 * (2 ^ 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) + 5,764,607,523,034,234,940))) +
1 + 2 * (5 * 2 ^ (5 * 2 ^ (5 * (2 ^ 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) + 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) +
(5 * (2 ^ 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) + 5,764,607,523,034,234,940)) +
(5 * 2 ^ (5 * (2 ^ 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) + 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) +
(5 * (2 ^ 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) + 5,764,607,523,034,234,940))) +
1 + 2 * (5 * 2 ^ (5 * 2 ^ (5 * (2 ^ 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) + 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) +
(5 * (2 ^ 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) + 5,764,607,523,034,234,940)) +
(5 * 2 ^ (5 * (2 ^ 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) + 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) +
(5 * (2 ^ 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) + 5,764,607,523,034,234,940)))

AND FINALLY! Our last golem would make a total of... *drumroll*

1 + 2 * (5 * 2 ^ (5 * 2 ^ (5 * (2 ^ 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) + 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) +
(5 * (2 ^ 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) + 5,764,607,523,034,234,940)) +
(5 * 2 ^ (5 * (2 ^ 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) + 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) +
(5 * (2 ^ 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) + 5,764,607,523,034,234,940))) +
1 + 2 * (5 * 2 ^ (5 * 2 ^ (5 * (2 ^ 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) + 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) +
(5 * (2 ^ 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) + 5,764,607,523,034,234,940)) +
(5 * 2 ^ (5 * (2 ^ 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) + 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) +
(5 * (2 ^ 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) + 5,764,607,523,034,234,940))) +
1 + 2 * (5 * 2 ^ (5 * 2 ^ (5 * (2 ^ 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) + 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) +
(5 * (2 ^ 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) + 5,764,607,523,034,234,940)) +
(5 * 2 ^ (5 * (2 ^ 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) + 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) +
(5 * (2 ^ 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) + 5,764,607,523,034,234,940))) +
1 + 2 * (5 * 2 ^ (5 * 2 ^ (5 * (2 ^ 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) + 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) +
(5 * (2 ^ 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) + 5,764,607,523,034,234,940)) +
(5 * 2 ^ (5 * (2 ^ 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) + 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) +
(5 * (2 ^ 5,764,607,523,034,234,940) + 5,764,607,523,034,234,940))) Tokens

That's if my calculations are correct of course =P
THANK YOU FOR THE BRAIN TEASER SavajCabbaj! I owe you one ok?

this deck is right up my alley. i love to have these kinda of deck to where it takes your opponents a couple of seconds to figure out what the hell just happened. very well done.

xorpion88 has deleted this comment.

play a xenograft naming goblins then fling a precurser XD just for more shinanigan funs. cuz the last thing you wanna do is attack with x golems to have them be fogged or something rediculous. i will say cudos to the nuts combo but i have a deck with an answer already.

infinite mana combo, COP artifacts. ( the deck has all 6 cops in it so at some point it no longer matters what the deck does unless you make that many eldrazi spawns and play an intangible virtue to give them +1/+1 and vigilance, which is totally possible.) and another fun idea, add 4 gutter grimes and then just kill off one of your non-token creatures. you'll get that many slime tokens + that many mines parallel lives in counters on gutter grimes. so you will have x tokens with yx4 power/toughness. XD

love the shinnanigans decks.

or simply be a dick and add black so you can rite of replicate on an obliterator , xenograft so the obliterator(S) are golems, and then when he goes to spell in some direct damage, you redirect it to a precurser to make them sac every permanent they have and ever will have in equivalency.

Rhys the Redeemed ?

perhaps a more effective approach would be panoptic mirror and saproling symbiosis. Only takes 2 cards and doesn't leave all your enchantments open to creature destruction.

i believe it is possible to make even more things with only 4 cards. while it's not the golems they are creatures. I'm sorry to necro this tread but it's kind of and interesting question that i came up with that corresponds perfectly with this thread. so the quest/problem how many things can you put into play with out going infinite and only using limited (it can be arbitrarily large just not infinite) amount of mana?

while i will not limit you to single copies i believe if you do it rights it's all you need anyway. for reference i will say that my "combo" uses 60 mana total for the entire chain. i would post the number, but legitimately i haven't figured out how to even calculate it yet. i am going to do some research tonight and see if i can post the answer as best i can and at least put down my list of cards and the order to cast them in (yes that does matter for mine). while i believe i can out number everything posted on here with just 4 cards the total list is a full 7.

my store has a pretty dedicated EDH following so conversations like this one come up fairly often hence why i searched out a thread like this. i will post full answer hopefully over the next few days. it's an immensely complicated process to put it all down correctly into an calculator and or just on paper.

i will tease all of you by posting part of the equation that is happening while the 4th card is almost fully done resolving in all it's forms. 4,718,610 X 2^4,718,611. I'm pretty confident that this number would calculate out higher than anything listed on this thread yet and this is before I'm even though with the 4th card. this thread is titled most absurd and i think i can give a finite answer within reasonable constraints for in fact the most.

Ummmm....just cuz I really like this deck and The guys who were hating with their doom blades and destroy mah Precursors bull@#$....I have only one thing to say....Dark steel Forge...They are all indestructible and you can't kill them