My anaconda don't want none...

by NoSeriously on 29 November 2014

Main Deck (60 cards)

Sideboard (0 cards)

No sideboard found.

The owner of this deck hasn't added a sideboard, they probably should...

Submit a list of cards below to bulk import them all into your sideboard. Post one card per line using a format like "4x Birds of Paradise" or "1 Blaze", you can even enter just the card name by itself like "Wrath of God" for single cards.


Deck Description

...unless you got buns hun! (Aka fat ass).

How to Play

Be sure you're eating while you use this deck...

Deck Tags

  • Mono Green
  • joke
  • Midrange
  • Non-Standard

Deck at a Glance

Social Stats

36
Likes

This deck has been viewed 4,852 times.

Mana Curve

Mana Symbol Occurrence

000040

Card Legality

  • Not Legal in Standard
  • Not Legal in Modern
  • Legal in Vintage
  • Legal in Legacy

Deck discussion for My anaconda don't want none...

hah this is funny nice touch with city of ass

2
Posted 29 November 2014 at 07:48

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Thank you. Lol.

1
Posted 29 November 2014 at 16:45

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City of ass is actually pretty good

1
Posted 29 November 2014 at 16:54

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Actually, it's really good!

1
Posted 29 November 2014 at 16:55

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but it is half a mana sooooo.....

1
Posted 29 November 2014 at 16:56

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Yeah, but it's better than any guildgate or clan land or shard land

1
Posted 29 November 2014 at 16:57

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And it's not legendary, so if u have 2 of them...

1
Posted 29 November 2014 at 16:57

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if you dont.......

0
Posted 29 November 2014 at 16:59

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True, but then it's still good

1
Posted 29 November 2014 at 16:59

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YAY WASTELAND VIPER I HAVE ONE FOIL!!

2
Posted 29 November 2014 at 17:11

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Lol, yes u do

1
Posted 29 November 2014 at 17:21

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YAYAY AYAYAY

1
Posted 29 November 2014 at 17:22

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door of destenies

1
Posted 30 November 2014 at 00:55

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that song, its so damn catchy and educational!

0
Posted 01 December 2014 at 08:19

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Lol, yes, it is

0
Posted 02 December 2014 at 01:51

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can i get a link?

0
Posted 02 December 2014 at 05:47

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Just search anaconda on youtube

0
Posted 02 December 2014 at 16:06

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lol... nice deck.

1
Posted 30 November 2014 at 00:32

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Thank you!

2
Posted 30 November 2014 at 05:50

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You guys literally wrote 13 comments just so your deck would get on the frontpage. That's embarrassing and disgusting.

-2
Posted 30 November 2014 at 01:07

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how about the 7 likes and i have seen decks with no comments on the hot page

1
Posted 30 November 2014 at 01:18

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The comments don't really matter. At least they are active on the site. It's good to see new people on here. Don't hate just because they made the hot page. It's hard to do if you aren't lucky or northernwarlord lol

1
Posted 30 November 2014 at 02:01

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drake has a point

1
Posted 30 November 2014 at 02:44

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Yep, most of the time you have to have 5 likes for the deck to become hot.
It can have 1,000 comments and not be hot.

1
Posted 30 November 2014 at 03:28

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Haters gonna hate. (That's you Relemin)

1
Posted 30 November 2014 at 05:51

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MetaSavant has deleted this comment.

Posted 30 November 2014 at 15:56

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you have lots of things with swamp walk maybe urborg to make your opponents lands swamps so you have unblockable creatures

0
Posted 30 November 2014 at 17:17

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Ok, thank you for the advice

1
Posted 30 November 2014 at 17:40

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stop staring at my ass, LOL

0
Posted 24 December 2014 at 02:29

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HAHAHAH LOL

0
Posted 31 December 2014 at 04:48

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Why not add some ambush viper's? i use it on some deck i made a while back and it's pretty fun to see people reactions to it

1
Posted 30 November 2014 at 04:52

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What should I remove?

1
Posted 30 November 2014 at 06:08

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the infect one it's just bad placed here, this ain't an infect deck....sure you got the regen but stil, i just don't imagine it having a place on this deck

1
Posted 30 November 2014 at 14:38

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Ok, thank you for the advice

1
Posted 30 November 2014 at 17:40

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use only 1 or 2 Urborg, Tomb of Yawgmoth , it's a legendary land, you can't have more than 1 in play...

1
Posted 30 November 2014 at 17:50

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I did, I added 4

1
Posted 30 November 2014 at 17:51

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eddit comment, didnt realise you added it already

1
Posted 30 November 2014 at 17:54

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Ok, that's ok

1
Posted 30 November 2014 at 17:56

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one thing how does this midrange?

1
Posted 30 November 2014 at 05:19

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Idk, is it aggro?

1
Posted 30 November 2014 at 05:43

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It seems like it SLITHERS between the two

3
Posted 30 November 2014 at 15:58

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does any one know why one of my decks has 10 likes and it is not on the hot pages? but nat youve done it again

1
Posted 30 November 2014 at 16:51

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lol. Which deck has 10 likes?

1
Posted 30 November 2014 at 17:32

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hiz azorius aggro deck

1
Posted 30 November 2014 at 17:33

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Oh, yeah, I think a deck has get the likes in a short period of time to be "hot"

1
Posted 30 November 2014 at 17:36

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two days ago it had 4

1
Posted 30 November 2014 at 17:47

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Oh wow! That's wierd that its not on there...

1
Posted 30 November 2014 at 17:48

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Well, I think the reason is because My Anaconda Don't Want None... Jumped like 7 likes in 6 hours, but yours only jumped 6 likes in 2 days

1
Posted 30 November 2014 at 22:39

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It's a combination of both likes and comments. Don't know exactly how it works out but that's what it is

0
Posted 30 November 2014 at 22:43

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Ok, I guess that makes sense

1
Posted 01 December 2014 at 03:13

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Really great strategy you have going on here NoSeriously, great tempo and very fluid. Plus, those 1/2 mana's from City of Ass will really come in handy for the mid/late game. I would be sure to sideboard some Jabba the Hutt and BBC.

1
Posted 30 November 2014 at 06:30

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Ok, thank you for the advice

2
Posted 30 November 2014 at 06:40

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What is jabba and bbc?

1
Posted 30 November 2014 at 06:41

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Just some 4-cmc 4/5 tramples w/ monstrosity. You know. May help w/ the win con

1
Posted 30 November 2014 at 06:44

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ok, but I tried to make all the creatures snakes, just for the flavor

1
Posted 30 November 2014 at 17:31

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My anaconda don't, my anaconda don't
My anaconda don't want none unless you got buns, hun!

Boy toy named Troy used to live in Detroit
Big dope dealer money, he was gettin' some coins
Was in shootouts with the law, but he live in a palace
Bought me Alexander McQueen, he was keeping me stylish
Now that's real, real, real
Gun in my purse, bitch, I came dressed to kill
Who wanna go first? I had them pushing daffodils
I'm high as hell, I only took a half a pill
I'm on some dumb shit, by the way, what he say?
He can tell I ain't missing no meals
Come through and fuck him in my automobile
Let him eat it with his grills and he tellin' me to chill
And he telling me it's real, that he love my sex appeal
Say he don't like 'em boney, he want something he can grab
So I pulled up in the Jag, and I hit him with the jab like
Dun-d-d-dun-dun-d-d-dun-dun

My anaconda don't, my anaconda don't
My anaconda don't want none unless you got buns, hun!

Oh my gosh, look at her butt
Oh my gosh, look at her butt
Oh my gosh, look at her butt
(Look at her butt)
Look at, look at, look at
Look, at her butt

This dude named Michael used to ride motorcycles
Dick bigger than a tower, I ain't talking about Eiffel's
Real country-ass nigga, let me play with his rifle
Pussy put his ass to sleep, now he calling me NyQuil
Now that bang, bang, bang
I let him hit it cause he slang cocaine
He toss my salad like his name Romaine
And when we done, I make him buy me Balmain
I'm on some dumb shit, by the way, what he say?
He can tell I ain't missing no meals
Come through and fuck him in my automobile
Let him eat it with his grills, and he telling me to chill
And he telling me it's real, that he love my sex appeal
He say he don't like 'em boney, he want something he can grab
So I pulled up in the Jag, Mayweather with the jab like
Dun-d-d-dun-dun-d-d-dun-dun

My anaconda don't, my anaconda don't
My anaconda don't want none unless you got buns, hun!

Oh my gosh, look at her butt
Oh my gosh, look at her butt
Oh my gosh, look at her butt
(Look at her butt)
Look at, look at, look at
Look, at her butt

Little in the middle but she got much back
Little in the middle but she got much back
Little in the middle but she got much back
(Oh my God, look at her butt)

My anaconda don't, my anaconda don't
My anaconda don't want none unless you got buns, hun!
My anaconda don't, my anaconda don't
Don't want none unless you got buns, hun!

Oh my gosh, look at her butt
Oh my gosh, look at her butt
Oh my gosh, look at her butt
(Look at her butt)
Look at, look at, look at
Look, at her butt

Yeah, he love this fat ass, ha haha!
Yeah! This one is for my bitches with a fat ass in the fucking club
I said, where my fat ass big bitches in the club?
Fuck the skinny bitches! Fuck the skinny bitches in the club!
I wanna see all the big fat ass bitches in the muthafuckin' club
Fuck you if you skinny bitches, what?! Kyuh
Ha ha, ha ha
I got a big fat ass (ass, ass, ass)
Come on!

10
Posted 30 November 2014 at 09:00

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u need the real version of the song by sir mix a lot "baby got back"

1
Posted 30 November 2014 at 09:40

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Thank you for supplying us with the totally appropriate lyrics to this totally appropriate song!

3
Posted 30 November 2014 at 17:46

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JK, but wow, that (like most songs) is dirtier than it sounds

1
Posted 30 November 2014 at 17:47

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yep vgjhj,jb

1
Posted 30 November 2014 at 17:47

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No need to thank me. That's why I'm here for.
: )

1
Posted 30 November 2014 at 19:17

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XD did you just look up the lyrics and copy and paste them, or did you actually type them?

1
Posted 30 November 2014 at 22:11

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STEP 1:listen to the song

STEP2:Take a drink every time nickis says ASS and BICTHES.

Oh,and every time she says NIGGA

STEP 3 die form MAXIMUM OVERDOSE!!!

STEP 4 Have someone write the lyrics on your grave.

2
Posted 30 November 2014 at 22:25

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they should add that to the dumb ways to die video

1
Posted 30 November 2014 at 22:36

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And here I thouoght it was about Sir Mix-A-Lot!?

I like big butts and I can not lie
You other brothers can't deny
That when a girl walks in with an itty bitty waist
And a round thing in your face
You get sprung, wanna pull out your tough
'Cause you notice that butt was stuffed
Deep in the jeans she's wearing
I'm hooked and I can't stop staring
Oh baby, I wanna get with you
And take your picture
My homeboys tried to warn me
But that butt you got makes me so horny
Ooh, Rump-o'-smooth-skin
You say you wanna get in my Benz?
Well, use me, use me
'Cause you ain't that average groupie
I've seen them dancin'
To hell with romancin'
She's sweat, wet,
Got it goin' like a turbo 'Vette
I'm tired of magazines
Sayin' flat butts are the thing
Take the average black man and ask him that
She gotta pack much back
So, fellas! (Yeah!) Fellas! (Yeah!)
Has your girlfriend got the butt? (Hell yeah!)
Tell 'em to shake it! (Shake it!) Shake it! (Shake it!)
Shake that healthy butt!
Baby got back!

(LA face with Oakland booty)
Baby got back!
(LA face with Oakland booty)
(LA face with Oakland booty)

[Sir Mix-a-Lot]
I like 'em round, and big
And when I'm throwin' a gig
I just can't help myself, I'm actin' like an animal
Now here's my scandal
I wanna get you home
And ugh, double-up, ugh, ugh
I ain't talkin' bout Playboy
'Cause silicone parts are made for toys
I want 'em real thick and juicy
So find that juicy double
Mix-a-Lot's in trouble
Beggin' for a piece of that bubble
So I'm lookin' at rock videos
Knock-kneeded bimbos walkin' like hoes
You can have them bimbos
I'll keep my women like Flo Jo
A word to the thick soul sisters, I wanna get with ya
I won't cuss or hit ya
But I gotta be straight when I say I wanna *fuck*
Till the break of dawn
Baby got it goin' on
A lot of simps won't like this song
'Cause them punks like to hit it and quit it
And I'd rather stay and play
'Cause I'm long, and I'm strong
And I'm down to get the friction on
So, ladies! (Yeah!) Ladies! (Yeah)
If you wanna roll in my Mercedes (Yeah!)
Then turn around! Stick it out!
Even white boys got to shout
Baby got back!

Baby got back!
Yeah, baby... when it comes to females, Cosmo ain't got nothin' to do with my selection.
36-24-36? Ha ha, only if she's 5'3".

[Sir Mix-a-Lot]
So your girlfriend rolls a Honda, playin' workout tapes by Fonda
But Fonda ain't got a motor in the back of her Honda
MY ANACONDA DON't WANT NONE
UNLESS YOU'VE GOT BUNS, HUN
You can do side bends or sit-ups,
But please don't lose that butt
Some brothers wanna play that "hard" role
And tell you that the butt ain't gold
So they toss it and leave it
And I pull up quick to retrieve it
So Cosmo says you're fat
Well I ain't down with that!
'Cause your waist is small and your curves are kickin'
And I'm thinkin' bout stickin'
To the beanpole dames in the magazines:
You ain't it, Miss Thing!
Give me a sister, I can't resist her
Red beans and rice didn't miss her
Some knucklehead tried to diss
'Cause his girls are on my list
He had game but he chose to hit 'em
And I pull up quick to get wit 'em
So ladies, if the butt is round,
And you want a triple X throw down,
Dial 1-900-MIXALOT
And kick them nasty thoughts
Baby got back!
Baby got back!

2
Posted 01 December 2014 at 12:02

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No, I don't think that line is in baby got back... but anaconda IS a total rip off of it

0
Posted 02 December 2014 at 01:56

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I highlighted the line, it IS from it!
I own the original CD, BTW.

0
Posted 02 December 2014 at 14:56

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Ummmm, you highlighted the part that says: dial 1-900-MIXALOT

0
Posted 02 December 2014 at 16:07

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Look again. Line 3 and 4 of third strophe.

Or just listen to the freaking song, it's on YouTube.

0
Posted 02 December 2014 at 18:52

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LMFAO...... :D

0
Posted 02 December 2014 at 19:06

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LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL.
Funny Shi.t Nice Deck though

0
Posted 02 December 2014 at 20:22

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Ok, the line just seems kind of out of place

0
Posted 03 December 2014 at 23:54

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Edit: Removed 4 Forests, added 1 Urborg, Tomb of Yawgmoth, removed 4 Blight Mambas, added 4 Ambush Vipers

2
Posted 30 November 2014 at 17:48

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i need some help with a deck called azorius aggro it is based on buffing creatures up with aven something or other (i dont remember what it is called) but no legality rules but would like to keep it budget

1
Posted 30 November 2014 at 18:01

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lol nice deck!
who would have thought of this being so popular!

2
Posted 30 November 2014 at 22:19

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Thank you, I did not expect it at all either. It had like 3 likes, then I logged on 6 hours later and it had 10 and I was like holy crap!

2
Posted 30 November 2014 at 22:36

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I love fun decks that use unhinged\unglued cards. I don't play casually, but this is just funny

1
Posted 01 December 2014 at 00:54

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Thank you!

2
Posted 01 December 2014 at 03:14

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Who the fuck is -1 every comment on here????

1
Posted 01 December 2014 at 00:47

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Well I just plus'ed them all to fix it...

3
Posted 01 December 2014 at 00:52

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Damn trolls. I shall also +1 all comments. Rep for EVERYBODY!!!

2
Posted 01 December 2014 at 03:44

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yay so much rep

1
Posted 01 December 2014 at 03:46

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Lol. Thank you drake and zaklax

0
Posted 02 December 2014 at 01:54

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1+ likes yah
10+likes yah!
20+likes YAH!
50+likes not yet
100+likes not yet
over 9000 likes NOT YET

0
Posted 03 December 2014 at 22:34

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hopefully I'll reach the 4th one...

0
Posted 24 December 2014 at 04:45

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only one of my decks has cleared 100 likes. it uh, it kinda broke the hot page for like...2 months

0
Posted 24 December 2014 at 04:48

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wow. Yeah, I don't think this deck is gonna stay on the hot pages for much longer, or get 100 likes, for that matter, but there's always hoping...

0
Posted 24 December 2014 at 16:31

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haha funny name. i like it

0
Posted 01 December 2014 at 21:43

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Thank you!

0
Posted 02 December 2014 at 01:53

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Hate the song but the deck made me chuckle.

Check out my latest if you wish, hopefully I can make you chuckle too.

http://www.mtgvault.com/socalithurts/decks/bw-lifegro/

1
Posted 03 December 2014 at 02:37

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thank you!

0
Posted 03 December 2014 at 23:55

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Perish made my day :D

0
Posted 03 December 2014 at 21:13

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You're welcome

1
Posted 03 December 2014 at 23:55

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LOL! one of the best I've seen

0
Posted 19 December 2014 at 00:43

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Thank you, thank you very much!

0
Posted 19 December 2014 at 05:40

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Check out my deck splinta twin yo face with myrs

-1
Posted 30 December 2014 at 22:00

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omg why did you do this

0
Posted 30 December 2014 at 22:26

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cus I can !!!

-2
Posted 31 December 2014 at 04:50

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check out my deck super aggro modern jund

-2
Posted 31 December 2014 at 04:51

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I think what he means is why did you advertise your decks on a popular deck just so more people will look at them?

0
Posted 31 December 2014 at 16:52

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yea i already gave him a bunch of shit for it. we are good now lol

0
Posted 31 December 2014 at 17:19

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YYYAAAAYYYY!!!!!!!!

0
Posted 31 December 2014 at 19:24

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Funny Deck

0
Posted 05 February 2015 at 02:36

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Thank you!

0
Posted 06 February 2015 at 04:44

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