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The mental image of Elesh Norn bursting out of a Wurmcoil Engine and killing everything gets me so hard. Kudos for all the feedback, Vaulters! 8/2011: Edited for post-rotation. The absence of Preordain, Spell Pierce and See Beyond doesn't hurt nearly as much as I thought.
This deck has been viewed 42,296 times.
you have an interesting idea of porn. nice deck though. :)
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LOL. hey wumps would you mind checking out my last few decks and telling me what you think? they are my first attempts at legacy builds:p
Elesh Norn is sexier than sex. Mad respect!
Can you guys check out my first scratch built deck and comment please :) i love the deck aswell Awz? its amazing
Elesh Norn is very sexy, how about the elvish champion????? look at her in this deck: http://www.mtgvault.com/ViewDeck.aspx?DeckID=203781
I despise elves. That said, she's still hittable. WITH MY FIST.
i like it but why birthing pod?
Because it's better than porn.
lol in my experience, getting a straight answer from Awz? is like getting a rock to say hello.
I've only made right decisions.
Hahahahahahahaha, man. description made me laugh so hard.
Only thing HAWTER would be Bone Saw back in standard. Norn + Bone Saw = BUCKETS, my brother. Buckets.
Sides... In pain... From laughter... XD Awz? You never cease to amuse me, and this is actually a pretty sick deck if it gets to work for a kicker. I might actually try something like this if I don't just get to laugh at everybody in standard when I get to bring out a playset of smallpox and call to the grave XD
Debating on putting in Tezzy's Gambits and some way to put Norns back in the deck. Here's hoping to Fabricate in M12. Respect!
Tezzeret's Gambit is good in a LOT of decks, and I think this would qualify. I don't think it's ideal, but it's better than an Ingenuity.
WHAT!!?!? I did the exact same thing but in Naya colors, with Myr Superion's. I changed my Face Smashin' Stompers deck from Jund to Naya, but haven't updated it on here. But yeah it still sucks without Bone Saw.
My card crew and I think Birthing Pod is going to be the most abusable card in Standard. It's amazing. Bypass casting costs/restricions, abuse triggers, dick around with graveyard effects... Oh, yeah.
I just realized why you love Bone Saw so much.
REALLY. Do tell.
Well it's a saw, it's made of bone, and it's a Bone Saw.
AND, it's almost porn. (Buckets made me laugh)
Nailed it.
The fact that it has it's own song is a plus too. It's done by Six Feet Under for those who don't know.
Damned good song, too, for the record.
Lost my virginity to Bonesaw. ... ... ... ... Not the song mind you.
I have to ask. How do you play Elesh Norn?
Nevermind. Read Birthing Pod.
IT'S BETTER THAN PORN
omg i cummed when i saw his deck great idea
Come on man.... That's disgusting.
Elesh Norn is hawt like fiyah.
try doing a bit faster way of mana like tolarian academy or some myr or something. PS. You guys are sick, and its hilarious lol
No myrs. Personal prejudice. Tolarian Academy isn't standard, right? Can't do, sah. I don't have the cards or the pocketbook for legacy, and unlike almost every other shitty deck I make, this one's legit. Respect, though!
Wow. Would ya look at that. I'm on the Top Decks list right now. Never expected that to happen, seeing as I'm pretty much a giant troll on this site, but hey, appreciated nonetheless. Mad respect, kids.
That was my master plan >:DDD
I think you need more birthing pods to actually pull this off. Neither of your mages let you search for the pod because it's more than 1 and less than 6 converted mana cost. That would be a sick combo though. sacrifice a 6/6 for two 5/5's and a 4/7.
I hear ya. I was thinking either Kudoltha Forgemasters... or being a chump and riding Tezzeret's dick. WHY IS FABRICATE NOT IN STANDARD
BECAUSE IT ROTATED WHEN SCARS WAS RELEASED... PROBLEM?
:( Don't remind me.
Nice deck ^^
She's aight.
if ur baseing pretty much ur entire strategy on them, why do u only have 2 birthing pods,
Good point. I dunno. It's either splash black for Tezz, or kick out two useless cards. Hmm. Might kick out Trinket Mages. We'll see.
Yes! Brought up the hundred - soooo hot right now.
Crazy, huh? I imagine it's because Norn is gorgeous.
Norn's a babe. Radiant Archangel was my mtg poster girl. But Norn, with that beautiful beak of hers. Gonna put it out there: 10
I love the idea behind the deck. Birthing pod is awesome. :D Grand Architect gives you some weird ramp, turns your blue creatures into ramp if necessay, including himself.. See Beyond (till is cycles out of standard) means you can put an Elish Norn in your hand back into your deck, because it's useless in your hand without white mana. Shape Anew could be a good searching method as it gets you a memnite/birthing pod/wormcoil engine It's better if you don't have the elixirs/memnites and and have ways of making token artifacts. Possibly if you went blue/white, (Making Elish Norn playable if neccessary) you could run masters call as a way of getting artifact tokens onto the battlefield that you can shape into birthing pod/wormcoil engine. If you don't go white you can use Wing splicer. If you go blue white, i'd recommend Glacial Fortresses and Seachrome Coast I'd take out the trinket mages for a different blue creature, maybe augury owls to scry for things you need, or Oculus or Seagate Oracle. They also feed Grand Architect if you put him in. Best of luck with it!
You have grand Architects :-/ So yeah disregard that bit of advice, feel silly now.
Gonna kick out Trinket Mages for See Beyonds and another Birthing Pod. Respect!
if you didi it with sheoldred you could have constant come backs of the wurm and use it to get anothe thing like, another sheoldred if the one in play dies or even elesh norn
My friend is doing just that. I think that a buff to all my existing creatures and a debuff/board wipe to the opponent's is WAY superior to getting Wurmcoil back.
Why not try shape anew and blightsteel colossus? instead of treasure mage and Wurmcoil?
... Because. Because it's BETTER. ... Than PORN.
What if u draw Elesh Norn? u should use see beyond.
DONE! Respect!
YO! I'm putting my version up here finally. Check it out if you want. (DO IT. I know you want to.)
Done and DONE, my man.
Wow this a pretty well built plan. Love Elesh Norn, awesome use!
Sho 'nuff.
Kenny Oberg ran something like this at Nagoya, they called it the podcaster. I liked his better cause he could tutor large artifacts out with treasure mage, even with grand architect 20 land seems too low? And you have 16 total artifacts in the deck would that make kuldotha forgemaster viable? Ichor wellspring is better than mycosynth wellspring imo, but running 20 land makes that a different story.
Damn, I thought I was living out my twisted fetish in an interesting way and NOT shamelessly netdecking. Oh, well. Guess Oberg agrees: it's better than porn. Trinket/Mages were ultimately a waste of space. Having only 8 CMC 1 and 6 artifacts makes them kinda pointless, where as Forgemasters can thin out lands, fetch a Birthing Pod, then get explode into a Wurmcoil... which can then have Norn chest-burst out of it. The only thing I'm honestly considering changing up is kicking out a few cards for Kraken Hatchlings. 0/4 one-drops that can tap for mana and wind up becoming stupid 6/10 juggernauts. Tough call.
I like the deck and everything dude but why not just buy a double ended dildo and let your opponent do all the work... and call it a draw still a win win for you and your opponent?
Only if that opponent is Elesh Norn.
Trinket Mage and Treasure Mage are two different cards, Treasure Mage gets the Wurmcoil Engine that you need to sac to birthing pod. Not sure how Kuldotha Forgemaster thins out lands but okay man.
Yes. I realize I mis-typed "Trinket/Treasure Mages," as I was debating running both. Trinkets to get Memnites for the Forgemaster, and Treasures for Wurmcoil. BUT, that's pretty nil. Forgemaster kills my Wellsprings and gets me lands, fetches a Birthing Pod, then sacs for the Wurmcoil, THEN sacs for Norn and two 5/5s. I like impractical, unnecessary combos. This one just happens to work.
add spine of ish-sah to your buy list... it's great for artifact sacrificing
Too many win conditions spoils the broth, as the saying goes. The card's GOOD, but it's sideboard material at best for now.
Swiftfoot boots. Does nuts things with forgemaster.
I love mine! I've got two foil Elesh and a Japanese one, and a foil Wurmcoil. The deck is really good too, so despite the fact that my Elesh Norn's blind everyone, I beat them for reals, really funlike. It also arrouses me, ME, when I "cast her". I actually do alot, sometimes as soon as turn 4. :D
no matter how blind she can see my big dick elesh norn my pron baby! oh yeah
Come to think of it, I see no reason why you would need 2 Norns if you replaced one of them with Sheoldred. One of the only ways I see failing to win after popping her out is if she eats a go for the throat you can't manage to counter. Fine, that's why two Norns right? Or you could pop out Sheoldred, who is immune to the damn creature kills, and just pop Norn back onto the battlefield in the next round. (and keep bringing back your wurmcoils) If you wanted to play it REALLY safe you could run 1 Norn and 2 Sheoldred.
Edit - She's immune to terrify, not go for the throat :( Ah well, I still think it's not a bad idea. On the off chance having norn and 2 5/5s isn't a win, having Sheoldred AND Norn out surely is. (and fun too)
Elesh Norn is better than porn. Sheoldred is destined to die alone in a house full of cats.
Spiders man, SPIDERS!!
The lightning bolt on her head puts Harry Potter's to shame.
It's a funny coincidence that I'd already been obsessing over wurmcoil engines and elesh norns (and was itching to build a new deck) when I fired up the Vault one day and saw Better Than Porn on the front page. Being a lover of all things porn, naturally I investigated. I knew right away it was destiny. :) I love your birthing pod strategy and the combo inspired this: http://www.mtgvault.com/ViewDeck.aspx?DeckID=210720 I opted to go green/white and make sure everything was payable with native mana, however my sideboard has some tricks up its sleeve. Alloy Myr just freak people out even if I'm only using their CMC=3 as a starting point for upgrading to indomitable angle, kuldotha forgemaster and putting out a blightsteel colossus prettttty early. Still, I'd rather make it to a wurmcoil engine a lot sooner. I'd love to hear your suggestions for making my deck stronger and safer at FNM without... turning it into your deck. :3 Thanks for the inspiration!
indomitable angle? i meant archangel but I suppose a darksteel T-square isn't a bad idea if you're a carpenter on New Phyrexia...
Thank you, sir/ma'am/other.
So a few weeks ago I decided I wanted to get into MTG again. I haven't played since the Invasion cycle, and lost all of my cards (o no!) Anyway, knowing what an expensive hobby this can be, I decided I just wanted to make myself a premium, strong, fun deck. This one caught my eye, it's got everything I love, control, consistency, and a shit your pants core combo. (Elesh Norn has this effect) I constructed and used this deck in a bunch of games this week, including some group play. It did pretty damn well (even against some not-legal-in-standard decks). However, I noticed that the decks that seemed to do the best in group play were decks that could get completely out of hand if given enough time. (And I couldn't deal with them) I love the flavor of the birthing pod, so I decided to tweak my own version for group play/ffa. http://www.mtgvault.com/ViewDeck.aspx?DeckID=217093 Control has limited use with 4 or 6 or 8 people in a game, so I instead opted for redundant options. Still definitely a work in process, I would love some help tweaking it before I actually make it. Most importantly, this deck could get absolutely crazy given enough time. The Praetors just wreck in FFA (even though they make you a huge target)
Sorry about taking so long to get to this. On it.
Not a bad idea to splash white - but I would put at least a couple of basics in there so that you could fetch them with Sad Robot if you needed to. I see how losing See Beyond kind of forces you to do this. Actually seeing the swiftfoot boots kind of makes me slap myself a bit. (I kind of hate equipment decks, so I always overlook them) Ive been wracking my brain trying to find a way to protect Sheoldred in my own version of this (she's completely lynchpin to my own version) This is kind of totally perfect. Oblivion rings are totally sex too. Might want to throw in a few dispatches too though? (metalcraft is pretty easy to obtain here)
Yeah, I just gave this a test-run with proxies a while back, and the duals are a lost cause. Four Simulacrums and four Islands are superior. FORGOT FORGOT FORGOT about Dispatch. The hell is wrong with me. By the way, this deck sucks now. My newest one is the hottest thing this side of the sun.
I looked through your decks, and they're all really avant garde. You're extremely creative with your combos- I wish I could see the purpose in cards like you do. Just sayin, good work.
Why thank you. That's the really big draw of MtG for me. I love making impossible, funny things happen far more than I enjoy actually winning. Else I'm just a troll and put Bone Saws in everything. Respect.